WORDS TO LIVE BY

Hello everyone,  as I seem to be on a roll with words, today I thought I'd share with you some inspiring ones, mostly sayings and  slogans I have learned from my travels.  Some from attending Al-Anon meetings from one city to the next where I have been fortunate to visit. Admittedly, I'm learning all the time how so many of these phrases make a difference in my life.  I've also been reading Liz Gilbert's book Eat, Pray, Love for the second time, if only to visit Bali (where my son was lucky to have been a few months ago)once again and witness what seems to be a "true romance" in progress.  I'm living vicariously through the author who is such an inspiration since my life has been a cloistered 3 months in Leland, NC, living without wheels but focused on writing, which isn't a bad thing.  I'm just due for a change.

So what moved me to manifest these inspiring sayings and share them was my latest sojourn into the world of relationships.  With our computers capable of video phone calls using Skype, it's easy to get connected with someone on the other side of the world.  Alas, it was a fruitless endeavor, and the saying that popped into my head when he expressed he wasn't looking for a partnership was "man's rejection is God's protection."  With these words along with a combination of being so far away and the fact I've been through some of the most difficult emotional times lately, my resiliency to rejection has grown tremendously.  Happy to say my heart is intact and I'm ready for the next chapter.  I love myself so much now, the awareness of how God wants the "BEST" for me is so easily applicable to my life.  I have truly become a very strong woman.

Another great saying I learned at a meeting was fear is Forgetting Everything is All Right.  Fear is something we all have made bedfellows of and don't need it in our lives one iota.  Courage I think is it's counterpart and I am using that modis operandi  instead.  When I was living in Texas, I saw this saying on a bathroom wall at a place in Austin called "For the Love of Christy."  Where people could come and heal and grieve from losing a loved one too soon.  It said, "Fear knocked on the door, love answered, no one was there."  So with Love and Courage, I am determined to face the next 20-30 years of life(if I live that long) on this most challenging earth as one loving and brave wahine(woman in Hawaiian).

One Day at a Time is used in all 12-step programs and even though it may be an old and dusty bumper sticker slogan,  I noticed this really works for me especially when I choose to stay in the moment.  And continue to stay in the moment because as we all know these moments pass so quickly.  Speaking of time passing quickly. With the awareness time stands still for no one, I now have really committed to my favorite saying, "what people think of me is none of my business."  I do know there is a whole book with this title but this awareness comes with age and as I have aged, and with grace I might add, I love the idea of not giving a shit what anyone thinks of me.  It's why I was able to put out two books and live my nun's life with relative feelings of security.  I may not have a coterie of friends but I have a sisterhood of lovely ladies I can count on for love and support.  It's a sad day when we allow ourselves to be manipulated by others, when we are riddled with so much concern as to what others think of us.  Wayne Dyer's saying I gleaned from a church sign in Florida, "be independent of other's good opinions," is something I use every morning as I journal in my morning pages.  Such a theme of self-confidence has occurred you wouldn't believe. (said with a Jewish accent.) 

Here's a good one, "worrying is like paying interest on a loan you you didn't even take out." I certainly can embrace this one.  My mother worried, incessantly, her favorite thing to do was to grill me when I was going through a big change, "what are you going to do now?"  So my mind spinning around with a stable of negative thoughts when things were tough, I would have this mantra bouncing around, "what am I going to do now?" Over and over again.  Worrying as if I was taking a bath in it.  Over the last 44 years, I've been willing to allow this practice of Subud with it's purifying latihan to purge me of my demons, past mistakes along with the ones of my ancestors.  As I read once, "I know God only gives me what I can handle, but I wish he didn't trust me so much."  I wouldn't wish my last 2-3 months on my worst enemy, but ironically, I have come out the other side with such a sense of my connection with the Power of God.  Honestly, I'm not pulling your leg/s.  It's like there is no separation from my hand and the air it moves in.  It is all God's power.  I'm also very grateful I have enough latihan experience to find the quiet place within and feel what God wants me to do now.  Well, most of the time.  I have worked on developing and trusting my inner barometer and it has finally become my trusted ally.  

I'll leave you with just one more of my recent faves, it's actually the last line of a poem called Body & Soul, "to stay young, to save the world, break the mirror."  Our souls which I've heard are eternal have no age, no time restraints, so just live in the moment, love yourselves, for you are all loving, lovable and splendid.  God bless!

Words, Words, Oh, Glorious Words

 Hello everyone, I wanted to share with you one of the poems in my book Essentials - giving birth to words, rhymes and a story or two only because I was so inspired by this film The Book Thief.  If you haven't seen it yet, make the effort to find it somehow and encounter an education in how words can lift up the spirit at its lowest.  I was ambivalent about watching this particular film but had read great reviews.  We have all seen numerous films on the Nazi's and the egregious behavior they displayed during WWII.  The most horrendous time in the history of our existence in my opinion, the main reason I had been skirting around watching it, not sure if I wanted to have those images put in my sensitive heart and mind once again.    A lovely lady, Beth Ventre, told me it was definitely a film to see, really special, so I found it on Solar.com and was in for such a treat I had never expected.  It spoke to me like no film has in a long time.  And of course it helped to have two of my fave actors, Emily Watson and Geoffrey Rush at the helm.  All the young child actors were also exemplary.  To give you an idea what it's about here is a  quote, or actually a short synopsis from the web, "based on the beloved  international bestselling book, The Book Thief tells the story of Liesel, an extraordinary and courageous young girl sent to live with a foster family in World War II Germany. She learns to read with encouragement from her new family and Max, a Jewish refugee who they are hiding under the stairs. For Liesel and Max, the power of words and imagination become the only escape from the tumultuous events happening around them. This film is a life-affirming story of survival and of the resilience of the human spirit.   I highly recommend this film.

I don't remember the exact year, 2006 or 2007 maybe, could have been sooner, but I moved back to Los Angeles from Austin, Texas and sent my daughter to live with her father in Seattle.  I was alone, had no job or money but I made my daily trek to an Al-Anon meeting for spiritual sustenance and community.  I met lovely people and someone gave me a bike for I had lost my car not being able to afford the payments.  (Something I went thru again recently.) I was able to ride my bike to the library in Santa Monica almost everyday.  What you will read below is one of the poems or stories that came out of that time of bare bones existence.  I'm still very much in love with words and the power they possess.  I hope I can only evolve into the writer  I'm striving to become.  Someone who can express what this little girl in The Book Thief discovered of herself with the help of the young Jewish man they helped during the war.  Thank you God for this amazing gift so many writers have at their fingertips.  I might read the book someday also.

I was going through all these photos, literally hundreds, I've finally decided to scan to my computer so not to have to schlep them around anymore. I came across this fabric made card my older daughter had given me in 1985 and in it was a quote she decided to share with me in the card which just now truly has relevance for me.  "The role of the writer is not to say what we can all say, but what we are unable to say." - Anais Nin  My daughter who is the ultimate artist in so many mediums has been such an inspiration to me and continues today and hopefully for many years to come.  Writers are artists too, painting pictures with words.  I hope you enjoy my poem and if you want to read more of my writing you can find my book on Amazon.com with many more poems and short stories.   God bless!!

Year of the Locusts 

The year it all vanished I felt like I died

My daughter left, then they took the house,

The car,  computer, TV and stereo

All removed when the locusts came

Imagining how the farmers felt

Having everything disappear in a twinkling

Fruits of one’s labor and love

All they had as identity and security

Then stealthily replaced with a magic discovery

Of  the prosaic library and the blessed word

Nothing to do but read and write

It flowed forth in a stream, no, a torrent

Claiming my role as a channel for words

When the locusts came it showed me

The joy that is poetry and verse

Feeling the hand being guided to create

Putting pen to paper, birthing a tangible thought

I kept company with the literary ghosts I admire

In the solitude required, I hunkered down

Then out of nothing came something

I've been told the pen is mightier than the sword

Will I topple my foes, praise and blame?

Of course, off to battle to conquer the world.

With my pen, with my (s)words…

All About Music (And Record Albums)

Now for something completely different.  A subject very close to my heart AND soul.  MUSIC, glorious music, at least what I refer to as music.  I'm fully aware there are creations out there considered to be "music" but I would have to call them questionable.  Alas, there is no accounting for taste but everyone is entitled to their opinion, I guess. (smiling) I especially want to touch upon the old album covers protecting and accompanying the old 78 rpm records, referring to the speed(meaning 78 revolutions per minute) at which they were recorded .  For some reason, as I'm living here in NC missing Los Angeles, A LOT, I think about one of
my favorite stores right in the heart of Hollywood, it's the  Trader Joes' on the corner   
of Sunset and Crescent   Heights. Blvd., one of my frequent stops on a grocery shopping day.  They have old record album covers displayed on the walls of the elevators and on the walls within the store.  It's very nostalgic of course, especially with my history of running around Hollywood in the day of the flat disc records.  I spent many an hour at Wallichs Music City on another Hollywood corner of Sunset and Vine, listening to records in the booths, I can't remember, did we have earphones then?   I used to own quite a lot of records, all various genres of music, rock n' roll, jazz, classical, ballet and opera.  As you observe, two of my favorite all time
record albums were the Beatles, Sgt. Peppers Lonely Hearts Club and Abbey Road.  Also, by far two of my favorite covers and on a list of 20 of the greatest album covers of all time. But what was inside was sublimity, actual music heaven.  No one could touch the Beatles, a major force in my development as a young person into adulthood.  There will never be a phenomenon like them again.  So incredibly prolific and culturally influential.  I would have even put the White Album up but it would have blended into the background.  The hours I spent listening to them, living in Laguna Beach, getting high and soaking in the genius of the four most admired musicians of their time.  I could certainly take up at least 2 blogs just talking about the Beatles. But I won't.  

I absolutely loved the Doors back in the Sixties and as our generation explored other alternative lifestyles, we as the first experimenters of hallucinogenic drugs, LOVED hearing Light My Fire.  If ever there was a theme song I'd attach to the crazy hippies, especially the Hollywood/Los Angeles type would be one of the greatest rock songs ever, with Jim Morrison yelling, "try to set the night on fire!"  We all went crazy! Always having to get up and dance to this song.  I also loved this album cover too you see to the left.  It came later and the most familiar song from this album,  Strange Days, was People Are Strange.  What a gift Jim had as our very own 60's crooner.  Gone way too soon like so many others.  Okay, let's move on to something a bit more humorous... and speaking 
of strange, you won't believe these album covers.  My other persona, the one that was raised listening to all classical music, piano by Chopin, ballets by Tchaikovsky, concertos by Prokofiev, wants to share a find from google searches about record albums.  The worst

classical album covers of all time.  This is hysterical.  You've just gotta check this out and have a good laugh.  Here is a sample to your right. SO SAD.  What were they thinking? http://www.classicfm.com/discover/music/worst-classical-album-covers-ever/   You  have to see it to believe it. 

But not to dwell on others mistakes, or blunders more like it. I only wanted to bring up this topic because there seems to be a resurgence of collectors of the 78 RPM album at this time(considered vintage but only a few have any substantial value). I notice DJ"s are always seeking out new records to use during their gigs of mixing and matching.  It's not unusual today to see record albums sprouting up in different music stores.  I'm only making an observation, I don't dare try and collect these rare albums until I have an actual record player.

I think one of the last record albums I schlepped around with me, (lost somewhere on the road, God knows where) were all opera, two-four disc jobs.  One with Norman Treigle on the cover dressed in a very elaborate, evil looking costume portraying Mephistopheles.  I wanted to keep this one particular album because I danced in the opera Mephistofele in Hawaii with Norman Treigle.  He was absolutely amazing. What a voice.  My fondest memory was when I had to be lying on the floor, also dressed as a debauched creature from hell, and he put his foot on my stomach and started to tickle me.  A real professional. It makes me smile.  I do believe some of my favorite memories in my life were when dancing in the operas in Honolulu.  Faust, Tales of Hoffman, the Judgment of Paris, and of course Mefistofele.  My mother also danced in the opera in  Rio de Janiero.  And my grandmother was an opera singer there also.  I really couldn't escape the influence of classical music or opera as a child.  I'm so grateful, for there is nothing like the sublime notes of a Mozart piano concerto, the peaceful and moving strains of Debussy,

the inspiring Requiems of Faure and Brahms.  I do so love and thoroughly enjoy the many compositions that will live on forever.  And I will always hold dear the songs of Lennon and McCartney and many other contemporary  composers.  My tastes are eclectic and how cool is that.  Oh, and I mustn't forget the great songs I've been privileged to sing in numerous Musical Theater shows. Wow, how rich is my life because I have so much music to keep me company.  I pray you all have an experience, the same uplifting joy and love when you hear this gift from God, coming thru his creation to touch our ears, mind, heart and soul.  Happy Listening!

New & Improved (I know you'll love it)

Once again it's time to market my book,  the product of  many hours at the computer resurrecting the memories of another lifetime.  It was like digging down deep into portals of the brain that have been laid dormant for years.  Similar to looking for that one photo you know you have buried deep in a box, and you remember seeing it once or twice over the last 40 years.  But is it still in that box?  Or did you throw it away because you didn't want to remember that time of your life?  When I decided to write this little book, I got over my shame very quickly. Oh yes, I lived a life only depicted in dark novels and R-rated films but people love to read about something unusual or unique.  About a time when someones personal memoirs reveal a life they can only imagine. I made the intention not to get too heavy with events best kept interred in the place of, "for my eyes only."  Listen, I want to share with you, who ever will read my book some extraordinary times in the life of a hippie/groupie teenager. Here it is available on Amazon.com    http://amzn.to/1lrOcOY

 I now honor that poor, young, lost soul, looking for love in all the wrong places, and I expose the whole sordid past.  People still listen and revere the music of Jimi Hendrix, Steppenwolf,  Janis Joblin and Big Brother & the Holding Co., and especially Neil Young.  Musicians I rubbed shoulders with, and to be honest other parts of my body.  Okay, I'm not gonna get too explicit.  I just want to get my book out there so I can finally get the attention it needs to make a film.  I am full aware of the well-known fact sex sells but it's really not the way I want to go.  "If the truth be told", the money that is required to bring this story to the big screen, realistically, is in the millions. And the public needs a film like this!!  I sometimes go on IMDB just to see what the budget was for some pretty awful films and it is quite alarming.  I used to say, mostly when I viewed one of these disappointing projects with their enormous budget, they could have fed a small African nation for a year with what they spent.  But I'm getting off track.  I know it will be quite expensive to make this story into a film and I actually did make a short 9:13 minute showcase reel for $6000. For now this little film will have to do until I can interest a big studio in Hollywood to bankroll a full-length feature film.  Here is a link to the video on YouTube:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=994x1RMaOFg  if you need a little fun and entertaining distraction from your work day.  And btw, I have a great tagline:
 Free-love still came at a price!

There will come a time I'll have to move back to Los Angeles and make the rounds, write the query letters, do the pitches, etc.  I may be in my late 60's before all this comes to fruition but who cares.  By then I'll even have a sequel to the film How I Survived the Sixties, and it will be called How I Survived MY Sixties.  I may have mentioned that before. And by then Hollywood may even have the love and respect us older ladies deserve.  I really enjoy writing this blog and I think it helps improve my writing.  Please enjoy the video and buy the book.  I know you'll love reading it.  I recently added some more text/experiences.  I love the idea of self-editing my own books.  I can always go back and change or add something.  Or even delete if that is the case.  So for now I'll be patient and see how it all pans out.  But I'm definitely "workin' it."

 "God's gifts put man's best dreams to shame." - Emily Dickenson

Yikes, this weather is enough to make you "park a bloody jumbo"!!

 For all of you who are wondering what the hell I'm talking about with this "park a bloody jumbo" statement.  It's very easily explained.  In the delightful British 4-parter called Lost in Austen, this young gal Amanda Price time travels back to the era of  novelist Jane Austen and thru a door in her bath tub, lands in the Bennet household circa 1813.  She is right in the beginning of the novel Pride and Prejudice, where she thinks it's a "Jim Carrey thing but period"(the Truman Show), goes into mild shock because of where she finds   herself  and is accused of making very elliptical statements including the observation of the expansive grounds of the Bingley estate.  As she rides in a carriage, and peers out the window she loudly states, "Wow, you could park a bloody jumbo" referring to the property, the size, and how a very large plane could land there.  Lydia, one of the Bennet sisters hears her remark and repeats it in the ballroom, having absolutely no idea what she is saying but she thinks it fits the dilemma she is speaking of to her sisters.  So I too feel the need to use the odd statement to refer to the quirky weather.

Why am I even bothering with this trivial pursuit of an explanation?  I haven't a clue.  I guess because I absolutely adore Jane Austen and can't get enough of her novels.  Or the films that are made from the novels.  And I absolutely love Lost in Austen, I can watch it over and over. I've been married twice and have had four children but that doesn't preclude how I'd love to fall in love just like the ladies in all the Austen stories.  Amanda Price also relished her time sitting on the sofa reading Pride and Prejudice to feed her fantasy of falling in love(with Mr. Darcy of course), following proper courtship and manners as Elizabeth, Elinor and Emma and the rest of the fabulous heroines that were created by one of the most beloved authors in history.

Now there is a film called Austenland, where a young woman(Kerri Russell) or man can visit and live, ever so briefly, a 19th century fantasy with costume and scenarios out of one of Austen's novels. I haven't seen it yet but I'm very curious about how they portray a modern sensibility seeking a long lost society where women were treated so differently than how they are now. (I'll write later after viewing the film).  

So, we were literally freezing, with the numbers in the teens, in NC the last few days and today it's in the 70's and sunny.  I could call the weather schizophrenic and it would apply but what came to mind with the sheer awe of how the weather altered so drastically was Amanda's comment, applicable to the radical tempature change, but thru Lydia's comprehension. Okay, I haven't lost it, by no means, but since words are such a magical thing, meaning one thing in one decade or country and changing in a matter of years to mean something else, I thought it would be fun to write about the series Lost in Austen.  You have to see it to know of what I speak.  Imagine someone who made remarks in 1813 coming from Hammersmith, England of 2006.  It's just so much fun to hear Amanda carry on with people who haven't a clue what she is talking about.  I love when she is telling the egregious character Wickham how she is going to broadcast his evil ways in "neon". And he asks ever so gingerly, "what is neon." I love it!

For example, in  just a few years the words straight and gay have both taken on new meanings from just 45 years ago.  Shagging in England means to have sex, but in North Carolina it's a very important dance with it's origination coming from right here in the south.   And there are many more examples but I had no intention of going off on this adventure with words, but I did, and to not make this too lengthy  I'll leave you with my bit of trivia especially for you fans of Sleep Hollow.  The very handsome Tom Mison who plays Ichabod Crane is also Mr. Bingley in Lost in Austen so you must watch it on Netflix and see a very clean, proper and blonde Mison take your breath away.   Now I'm gonna go watch Austenland.  I bid you all ado for now.
p.s. (UPDATE):  just watched Austenland and absolutely loved it.  Too funny! So out of the box strange and quirky.  Kerri Russell knocked it out of the park!

A taste of (the) Essentials ....

Essentials - giving birth to words, rhymes and a short story or two.

Good morning to you and good afternoon for others.  Here is my daily blog for Thursday, January 9th, 2014.... Already diving into the new year and writing up a storm.  I'm giving you all a little treat so you may get an idea what's inside this little book. Lots of poetry but a couple of inspired short stories. Please pass this on to your friends who enjoy reading personal, loving memories. I never thought this would be something I find great joy in doing.  But if the spirit moves me to do something, who am I to stand in the way with preconceived notions of what I'm really supposed to be doing.  Here is one of the two very short stories I wrote and want to share.  I hope you enjoy reading it.

Under the Piano 

I remember so clearly, the times I spent hiding under my mother’s baby grand piano.  I must have been not more than 3 or 4 years old when I found that I was protected from the world under that oddly shaped piece of furniture.  Sitting under this very large source of noise, becoming swallowed up by vibrations was a daily game for me as a child.   My mother had been trained as a concert pianist in Rio de Janiero, Brazil and spent hours playing some of the most beautiful music ever written.  She tried to teach me but I had no patience and it is one of the biggest regrets of my life.

I am getting older now and it is hard to remember my early years, when I first discovered the world but I know those times I spent under the piano shaped me.  The ever present sublimity of this grand music.  I remember….Chopin, Tchaikovsky, Liszt, Schuman. Sometimes my mother would let me put a sheet over the piano and I had my special fort.  I brought my toys and stuffed animals with me under this wooden and copper network of strings and chords and live in my own world.  Mother would play her music and I’d watch the padded keys, all across from one side to another.  The underbelly of this dark-brown, shiny musical instrument held such fascination.  I could only see her feet, legs, as she pressed down on the pedals.  Making the sound go quiet or louder was the function but I only saw shoes and pants do a stationary dance.  Up and down, up and down.

I used to wonder how the sound could be made with those funny felt-padded, wooden mallets.  But the treasured masterpieces that she played, more importantly, took me away to strange and new places.  Even the clacking of her fingernails on the white and black keys warmed me with familiarity.  I had discovered a different time and space I could go to, even when my mother and father would fight.  I could hide from all the scary goblins, become invisible to them where they could not find me.  It was my safe, holy, vibrating, cavernous, sanctuary which held so much comfort for me.  Even to this day, maybe not under the piano, but in an audience, or in the car, on the radio or with my earphones, I still listen to the music I soaked up, as if I were a little human sponge.  It is no wonder, listening to piano  being played is sheer joy.  It is God come near to hold me close and say I love you.

Films Worth Writing About

I lived in NYC for a little over a year, (I left Los Angeles, Jan. 2012)prior to moving here in Wilmington, NC.  I was very fortunate in that time to have been on the SAG Awards Nominating Committee, invited to numerous screenings of the films of 2012 which always included a Q&A with the cast and producers/directors of the films.  This included ARGO, Zero Dark Thirty, Le Miz, Life of Pi, and the list goes on.  I learned so much from the folks who made these films and enjoyed the privilege of receiving screeners which I'll have with me always. (Well, I did give a few away to my family.)  As circumstances would arise, I had to leave NYC, go to Florida for 2 months but then I found myself setting up household in Wilmington.  A whole different world.  

I love film, I want to make films, write the screenplays, produce, direct and act in them.  After arriving here in NC, I made a short film for the Cucalorus Cough Syrup Film Festival called I Was A Teenage Cough Syrup Junkie.  I hooked up with some great folks and not so great ones.  Suffice it to say, with a very difficult time dealing with the DP/Editor, and not taking control (my bungle), the film isn't what I hoped it to be, but whatever.  It was a good growing experience.  I followed with writing my 2nd screenplay, Lumina Love, about the entertainment pavilion that existed for 70 years in Wrightsville Beach.  You can read a news article about my endeavor.  http://bit.ly/1g98zCa

Acclimating to a new home, not knowing the lay of the land, etc., (a bit of culture shock) I found myself living in Leland, which ironically is referred to sometimes as LA.  I'm in a building where I don't honestly think I'll stay for long.  It's for 55+ active seniors but sometimes I feel I'm in a nursing home.  I do have to leave soon.  Most likely get back to LA, the big one in California.  But I've met a wonderful gal here named RaeMarie, who does a mean haircut and turned me on to Solar.com online to see all the latest films.  I did go to the theater to see Gravity and Blue Jasmine (I'll get back to them later) but all the other films that have been released recently I've been able to see online.  The Butler, American Hustle, Thor, and most recently Dallas Buyers Club. 

I had no idea what this film, with the most praise-worthy acting, was all about.  Not a clue.  I just knew that Matthew MacConaughey and Jared Leto lost a lot of weight to play their roles.  In the beginning you find yourself at a rodeo, lots of swearing and profane behavior.  Ummm, am I going to like this film?  So I let it unveil and the more I watched, the more I was intrigued and impressed.  Mr. M was almost  unrecognizable but even more so Mr. Leto.  Then to see Jennifer Garner who I do think is very underrated as an actress complete this most fascinating trio of magnificent performers.  The movie is about the Aids virus set in the 80's and how one person was determined to reverse his diagnosis(he was given 30 days to live) but also help hundreds of others who were plagued with the same disease.  I know this film was based on a true story and I recall hearing in the news about how the FDA worked hand in hand with Drug companies to undermine the healing of patients but I'm sure there was also a lot of artistic license incorporated.   With the desperation of the victims of this disease, they were willing to try anything.  So much mis-information was floating around at that time, and MM's character was trying to get to the bottom of it all.  The arc he traveled as an actor was so moving and realistic.  Talk about getting into character and losing 40 lbs to make sure it was real.  I highly recommend this film to everyone.  It's educational but also very entertaining.  I don't like listening to a lot of swearing, bigoted remarks and homophobic insults but for some reason it was all so necessary to tell this story.  I love and admire good storytelling, acting and filmmaking and this has it all.   So don't miss this example of great work for the screen. I'm certain, come awards time, both these men will receive much deserved prizes for their commitment and talent. 

 Now for our female leads, there is nothing more amazing than Cate Blanchett and Sandra Bullock in their respective vehicles, Blue Jasmine and Gravity.  If you haven't seen either one of those films I also highly recommend them.  But in all fairness, I do believe Emma Thompson, in Saving Mr. Banks, rules the roost as Best Actress of the year.  Maybe I'm just partial to Brits, or maybe it's because we share the same birthday, April 15, but I would watch that movie again just to see what she does with a very difficult and demanding role.  Wow, I have to say, it's going to be a tough Oscar race this year in the ladies category.  I haven't seen Philomena yet and I hear Judy Dench is pretty amazing.  As for secondary roles, I did like Oprah Winfrey in The Butler but had a difficult time watching the film because I've always been a civil rights activist and the way the those folks were treated just makes my skin crawl and I can get very angry at my own race.  How could people be so egregious?  

I did miss not being able to go to all the screenings this year like I did in the previous one and especially missed out on having my pic taken with celebrities.(winking here)  I call them my peeps.  I'm as passionate as they are about the medium of film, and like I mentioned before, I may just get back to Los Angeles very soon to be around that creative energy.  We'll see. Everything's a trade-off.  Since NC is losing it's tax incentive for films and it's a right to work state.  I don't think I have much reason to stay here.  As a SAG/AFTRA union member, I don't have opportunities available or being compensated fairly for my work as an actor and admittedly, I'm a California girl thru and thru.


So go to the theater and see some good films soon.  Some are 
worth your hard earned cash and others not (or you can find them online.)  I would think twice about American Hustle,  another film they can title, Much Ado About Nothing.  There are a lot of those out there.  About Time and The Secret Life of Walter Mitty are pure fantasy and a lot of fun. A bit of fluff for your viewing pleasure.  I'm forgetting something I know but I can always come back and edit this blog. Actually, I just remembered the film that didn't seem at all interesting to me when it first came out but turned out to be a very exciting and absorbing tale (true) which is Ron Howard's Rush.  With both actors turning in remarkable performances.  I really enjoyed watching Hemsworth and Bruhl!  I know there are many films I've missed and please feel free to recommend ones you've seen and think are viewing worthy.

Someday, my book How I Survived the Sixties will be made into a film, God-willing and I'll get involved from the very beginning, the process, the production and see it to it's completion.  As an astrologer once said to me way back when, "you will work in film and don't ever give up."  Yikes,  I almost did but until there is breath in me, I'll trudge forward and see what manifests.  I do believe in destiny but above all, I believe in miracles! 

A Shameless Plug!

 Good morning everyone,  and here is the Friday Shameless Plug for my books.  You see folks, I'm trying to raise funds to buy a car, nothing fancy, just something dependable that will get me to the store, auditions, etc.  I've seen the divinity for not having one at this time, you see I would most likely not have written these books.  But it's time to get on the road again, more or less. 
 Anyway, if you love poetry, you will love my book Essentials: Giving Birth to Words, Rhymes and a Story or Two.   And if you want to take a trip down memory lane, especially if you are a baby boomer like me than go for How I Survived the Sixties.  It's full of fun stories and iconic personalities I was fortunate to rub shoulders with in my youth.  The books may be thin on pages but very rich and potent in content.  I know you'll enjoy both.  I sure had fun writing them for all who will read them. Right now I'm very isolated from the big city(and a place to sing), my children, and a Subud community to keep me supported spiritually.
So I am doing what is front of me and becoming a lean, mean writing machine.  I do have two very cool feature film screenplays I can always work on so they are in prime shape if and when I get a big gun producer interested.  And a short film script I'm adapting from a story I wrote in college circa 2008.  Wow, that's already six years ago.  I can't believe how time is whizzing by.  My big reminder is looking at my children who are all adults now and they were just toddlers the other day. By the Grace of God, they are all doing so well, I couldn't be happier with all four and what they are accomplishing.  I want them to be as proud of me as I am of them.  So I'm doing whatever it takes to make up for all the years I didn't feel good enough about myself to share my passions and stories.  I hope you can support this burgeoning author here and I know you will not be disappointed with the books.  I'm thinking, maybe I need to offer a money back guarantee?  Nah,  But I know once you read them you will most likely want to pass them on to others.  At least I hope so. Oh, and what was really cool about this experience is that I was able to create the book covers with photos I have and I love the one on the Essentials cover of Greenfield Lake right here in Wilmington.  Gorgeous don't ya think?   Wishing you all a blessed year fulfilling your hopes and dreams.  I sure am gonna be busy working on mine.  God bless!!

AGE IS JUST A NUMBER!!!

   Hello dear friends, so as we acclimate ourselves to a new year, our resolutions and possibly other big changes, I want to touch upon a topic close to my heart. AGING IN AMERICA!   Yessiree, that is something that permeates my life everyday.  Whether it be with the outer world, as an actor, with it's false notions that the older person, especially woman are not bankable stars or even worth considering to emulate in anyway shape or form, or because I moved into an apt. bldg. for 55+ tenants and I'm surrounded by older folks.  Or being aware of my own inner growth and the realization my time is measured here on this earth and there is a purpose to all that I do in the way of leaving something behind and it has nothing to do with age.  As you can see, there are two photos here.  That is Natalie Cole in case you don't recognize her on the left(my friend Mark Anthony posted her pic on FB last night) and me from a pic taken about 3 months ago to help my friend get his Media company off the ground, as one of the talent.  We are both 63 years old.  Yes, I'm not kidding you. And I haven't even had any work done, YET!  I can't speak for Ms. Cole  but she looks pretty damn good. It sure helps to lose all the excess weight one can glom on as we age.  So what's it gonna be?  Do we finally come to the realization that age is just a number and we do our older population an injustice when grouping people together just because of specific digits?!

My new friend and neighbor, RaeMarie and I, were having a good laugh the other day about somewhere we read "those of you who are over 62 and elderly"  or some ridiculous statement to that effect.  We both could have been so offended.   OMG, these folks who write that stuff haven't a clue.  Of course, they don't live in LA or NYC where it's peoples  livelihoods depending on looking young.  It's impossible to tell how old someone is in those big cities where to be younger is better.  So I responded with a comic I had seen. "Not to worry, you know dead is the new 80."  Laughter is the best medicine isn't it?  I love that my friend has a great sense of humor and doesn't take herself to seriously.  I hope to get to that place.  Or is it something that comes with age?  She is one year older than I and btw, looks really great!!

If all of us 60-something's could move to England where they do so many films and TV shows with women over 60, we might not feel so invisible.  And they treasure them too!! I can't get enough of shows like the PBS's Cranford or an English TV serious Rosemary & Thyme.  As another friend of mine said to me once, hanging around a cosmetic counter in a dept. store, "We are supposed to get old."  Absolutely, how so very true....telling us not to age is 1) akin to telling a fruit not to ripen on the tree or vine, 2) it's the very sneaky way these huge conglomerate cosmetic companies and other anti-aging quick-fix doctors want us to keep spending our money on things we really don't NEED, and 3)creating a society where there is shame and guilt in aging (so we are easily manipulated), which is as natural as death, another very taboo subject much maligned.  I'll get to that subject in another blog.

So as we slide into another year with our aspirations, dreams and hopes, I want to take this time to say, if you don't feel old then kudos to you.  But if you do, then change that ridiculous idea.  It's all in an attitude anyway.  My good friend Lola Stone, in her 90's, lives in Thailand and writes a beautiful blog about her life, and it's pretty amazing. http://bit.ly/1hiDdtD  I had the great pleasure of meeting a female pilot, Anna Pennington, going on 91 years old this month. I can't tell you what a joy, thrill and inspiration it has been to get to know her.  We should all be so lucky to live such an exciting life with boundless energy, as she has, being the 2nd woman to receive her pilots license in 1941 here in Wilmington.   I do want to mention that there is a website/FB Page/Documentary film, The Beauty of Aging,  https://www.facebook.com/TheBeautyofAging  focusing on some incredible people all over 80 and 90 years old.  The stories they have to share.  Priceless!  Have a great 2014, no matter how old or young you are!  

HAPPY NEW YEAR

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!  How wonderfully optimistic it all sounds.  To have a new year, 2014, to be filled with good fortune, joy and delight.  I'm ready for that, are you?  No doubt.  We all want to know that elusive feeling of elation and gratitude 24/7 for our lives and be ready for all the good stuff to happen.  That's me for sure.  This last year, as my friend asked me to sum up in 3 words, was Moving, Growing and Writing.  So stress was a big part of my 2013 year with moving from New York to Florida to North Carolina.  We all know moving is very stressful... and growing?  Well, they don't call them growing "pains" for nothing.  Whew, the stuff that had to come out.  The enduring knowledge it doesn't end here.  We take it all when we leave so it's best to get rid of as much of the junk and negative stuff now as possible.  And I have truly given my life over to my Highest Power.  I have to admit, it's sometimes a tug of war.  I'm so impatient and if God isn't moving fast enough I want it back to fix it all myself.   Well, folks it doesn't work that way.  We get hit over the head by a two by four if we don't let go and insist on using our own will for the life we are meant to live.  At least I do.  

One of my very favorite sayings is by Emily Dickinson, she says "God's gifts put mans best dreams to shame."  Wow!!  Is that profound or what.  So today, I will see with new eyes that all the past has a design and purpose.  At this moment, the divinity of not having a car was the only way I would be forced to sit down and write a book, actually two.  They may be thin on pages but they are potent and rich in content.   I hope you all get a chance to read both.  I really enjoyed writing them over the years.  I made some changes to the book, How I Survived the Sixties, which is something one can do using CreateSpace.  So it's not available until tomorrow.  But do go to Amazon.com tomorrow and secure a copy.  You will not be sorry.  In the meantime, I will attempt to get a blog out at least every other day if not every day.

  Next week I meet with the fellow who runs the Browncoat Theater downtown so we can discuss producing Eve Enslers play Necessary Targets, about a small group of Bosnian refugee camp women.  I did the play as a staged reading in Austin, Texas.  I also saw it as a staged reading in Los Angeles, with Eve Ensler, Calista Flockhart, Julia Stiles, Juliana Margulies, Cloris Leachman, Kathleen Chalfant, and a Bosnian actress, Mira Fulan.  It's a great, powerful little play and I look forward to working on it.  God-willing of course.  I have to secure some wheels, soon!!  Did you hear that God?  Soon!!!  (she smiles and knows better) So I wish you all a blessed year but really, a blessed life.  Joy is an inside job but triggered by outside events.  Sometimes we resonate with some piece of music, or we hear a baby laugh, or we see a film that makes us experience tears of joy.  Contrary to popular belief, there is much joy to be had out in our world.  I wish this all for you because your good fortune is my good fortune. God bless ya'll!